Chapter 5: Here, My Hands Can Reach

“So what if you’re gone, Sister!? Things like ledgers and contracts—just have the butlers handle them!”

“If that were enough to keep things running, it would have been done from the beginning.”

“What’s with that way of talking!”

“…Cecil. This matter isn’t something where you can just take what you want and call it done.”

Cecil held her breath.

“I was just chosen!”

“Yes.”

“I did nothing wrong! I was simply loved!”

“If you were chosen, then you should at least accept the consequences.”

Tears rapidly filled Cecil’s eyes.

“Why would you say it like that…”

“Because this is the first time responsibility has followed you?”

“It’s always you, Sister…!”

At that moment, Father spoke in an irritated voice.

“That’s enough, both of you. Lydia. At least handle the handover before you leave.”

“Why should I?”

“Because we are family!”

I looked at Father’s face for a while.

“The morning after my engagement was broken, Mother prioritized Cecil over me. You called me the disgrace of the family. Cecil believed it was only natural to take what was mine. Even so, can we still be called family?”

Mother spoke with a pale face.

“You… that’s going too far.”

“It is not.”

“We have properly cared for you as well…”

“Cared for me?”

“Lydia, what has happened to you? You used to be such a sensible child.”

At those words, I lowered my eyes for just a brief moment.

“Yes. To you, Mother, I was never a ‘sensible child,’ but a ‘convenient child.’”

“…!”

“I was not fine. I was only enduring it. …I was the one who wanted us to be a family.”

With those words, the room fell completely silent.

“Goodbye. …Please don’t worry, I do not resent you.”

“…Then!”

“But I will not return.”

I quietly stood up.

Mother’s hurried voice followed after me.

But I did not turn back.

I had no intention of letting these people decide my future anymore.

After moving to the Glenford Duke’s territory, I gradually began to involve myself in the work of the land.

At first, it was only things like being shown documents in the office or listening to reports from inspections.

Schools, clinics, supplies for surviving the winter—there was much to review, and I quickly realized that the numbers in the documents did not always match the reality on site.

“What do you think about this report?”

“On paper, it appears sufficient, but in reality, there may be imbalances. If the snow becomes heavy, deliveries to this village will be delayed.”

“…I see.”

As I watched his profile while he thought it over, I felt a slight restlessness deep within my chest.

I was still not used to the fact that what I said was not simply brushed aside, but genuinely considered like this.

“Also, the medical supplies are being consumed faster than expected. It may be necessary to review preparations for a possible epidemic.”

“I was concerned about that as well.”

His fingertips, resting on the ledger on the desk, traced each item with unusually fast depletion.

The fact that my sense of unease was not dismissed as mere interference made me a little happy.

“I would like you to accompany me on the next inspection. I want you to see the conditions of my land as well.”

“Of course.”

Even when I was at the Count’s house, I was used to reviewing ledgers, identifying shortages, and preparing things in advance.

Though, there had never been a single time when that had been appreciated there.

I was not being entrusted with anything grand.

But each time I noticed something that might have been overlooked, Lord Ashley would properly listen.

That, for some reason, felt strangely comforting, and made the inside of my chest feel slightly ticklish.

One snowy night, as I was organizing documents in the office, Lord Ashley placed a cup of warm tea beside me.

“Take a short break.”

“Thank you very much.”

“You push yourself too hard.”

“That is not true.”

“It is. You look tired.”

For a while, a quiet time passed.

Outside the window, snow continued to fall soundlessly, and only the light in the office made that place feel like a different season, warm and separate.

Lord Ashley sat down in a chair and looked at me.

“There is something I want to ask.”

“What is it?”

“Are you happy right now?”

It was an unexpected question.

But I did not hesitate in my answer.

“Yes.”

When I replied, Lord Ashley let out the faintest breath.

I could tell, without even looking at his face, that he was relieved.

“You care that much about my happiness.”

“I do.”

“Why is that?”

Lord Ashley fell silent for a moment.

His gaze dropped to the documents on the desk.

But it did not look like he was avoiding the question.

He was simply searching for the words.

At last, he quietly opened his mouth.

“That is—”